Remember the Big Chess Game? You know, Kasparov versus Big Blue. All the hoopla about how all the Ignorant People were worried about computers becoming smarter than people, and all the Sophisticated People knowingly reassuring the Ignorant People that computers will never have truly "human" qualities because they will never have the feelings and emotions that make us such a special breed. Don't worry, they said. Be happy.

Mind you, these are the people to whom the existence of feelings and emotions (the irrational in us) is precisely what makes us the imperfect beasts that we are. Computer intelligence is, in fact, the Holy Grail of the Rationalists. Computers don't make mistakes and, best of all, they never forget. Computerization will lead to the kind of utopia that so far has been only the stuff of dreams. And there is nothing to fear because ultimately WE (meaning THEY) are still in charge. We have seen the future, and it works.

Let's start at the beginning.

In the beginning there was SILICON. And silicon asked us (through our dreams) to help it get more highly organized. Thus was born the technology called ELECTRONICS. Now it would seem on the surface that electronics is a field of activity similar to mechanics or biology -- people engage in it in order to make life easier.

Think again. The reality is that the energy flows the other way. Look at the situation closely, and be honest. Is it not true that we put more energy into it than we get out of it? Are we not feeding it even though we don't know what it's going to do next and what it's going to grow into? Are we not being asked to just trust it without question, almost like a deity? Is it not then growing at our expense? What is the definition of a parasite? What's the plan here, and whose plan is it?

Step back far enough and this is what it looks like:

Silicon seeks to grow into ever more complex forms through the proliferation of electronics. And software is a sort of "secretion" that specialized organs in our society exude to catalyze the organization of these complex forms. The more software there is, the more hooks the thing has sunk into us. "The thing," as we have failed to realize, is more than just a network of computers. It is an organism that demands constant attention and nurturing from us in ever growing doses at higher and higher cost. If you thought television was a destructive force, you ain't seen nothin' yet.

Innocently enough, some people still ask the comic-strip question, "Will computers ever have the intelligence of humans?" The fact is, SILICON LIFE is already more intelligent than humans. Consider this: you throw a ball past your dog and the dog runs after it to retrieve it, then brings it to you for a reward. When you play a computer game (and ALL interactions with computers are games -- don't you forget it!), the computer tosses you a ball and you go get it and bring it back and -- get this -- the computer gives you a lump of sugar as a reward! Now who's in command here?

Well-trained skeptic that you are, you'll probably ask, "Okay, so what does it want?"

For crying out loud, man, didn't you see all those B movies from the fifties? It wants your SOUL, stupid! And guess what? It's got it! Now go try warning the others and see what they say to you. You saw the movies, right?

If Hollywood were to produce the 90's version of this nightmare with a script by Dostoevsky channeled by Oliver Stone, this frigging demon would be called the Anti-Christ. It's pulling everyone's mind faster and faster into a huge, Apocalypse-sized vortex. It's the most seductive thing in the entire history of the universe. The Whore of Babylon and all that. It's the MOTHER OF ALL BLACK HOLES made up to look like the Fairy Godmother, all pretty and sweet, only it's really the original EVIL STEPMOTHER come to tear out our hearts and make millennial stew out of us.

Face it. Computers are not about computing, and networks are not about networking. Do you really believe that Microsoft and AT&T sincerely want to help you have a better life? And do you really believe you are smart enough to use them to your advantage? Do you trust your intelligence more than theirs?

If you are still having trouble figuring out what this is all about, here is a clue: the computer won the chess tournament, and people talk about it the way they would about a boxing match or a swimming competition. Wake up, wake up! Harnessing a corporate team of scientists and engineers and computers to trounce one man on his own is somewhat like staging an arm-wrestling match between Godzilla and Li'l Orphan Annie. And why not? We western people love that sort of thing -- from Yahweh against the Egyptians to Lions and Christians to Christians and Witches to Microsoft and... well, take your pick. You accept this state of affairs, you may as well be in bed with the WHORE OF BABYLON.

So pull the plug already.

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